Been having a spate of bad luck lately. which is quite unfortunate considering how good my year has been to me so far. Work is still going good and my life prima facie, seems pretty good.

Last Saturday, i was in high spirits as i drove out early in the morning to do a spot of shopping, go to the gym and maybe a haircut. But five minutes from home and i realised the car was clumping along and i stopped in a small road to check my tyres. Buggeration. I had a flat. And because i'm really a dumb girl, i was absolutely clueless and called the one person i thought i could depend on. Yes. You should already know who i'm talking about and if you picked up the past tense then you already know where this is heading to.

So anyway, just my luck, getting a flat on a saturday morning. Bummer. At least i had a boyfriend i could depend on, or so i thought.

After frantically pleading for help on the phone, he gave me vague instructions to look in the boot for my spare tyre. I tried lifting up the carpeting but it didn't look like it would give and given i had no experience with cars whatsoever, i figured maybe this car didn't come with a spare.

After telling Mart that i didn't think i had a spare, i expected him to immediately offer to come down and help me out but surprise surprise, Mart told me to give NRMA (road side assistance) a call saying they'd fix me up easy. He actually helped me find the number for the NRMA...

how nice of him *dripping with sarcasm*

so i gave NRMA a call and found out the only thing they could do for me if i didn't have a spare, was to tow me to the nearest car workshop but for that, i had to pay a membership fee with them for about 240 bucks. So i figured it'd be better if my darling boyfriend went to the workshop, picked up a tyre and fixed my car up for me. $$ savings all around.

So i gave him a call again.

And this time, i was in for a bigger surprise. Not only did he not offer to come immediately to my rescue, he nonchalantly told me to get david to help me out. WHAT THE FUCK.

I was furious. Seething with anger would be quite an apt desciption in fact.

I secretly cursed myself for allowing myself to be dependent because of my ignorance. i quickly put down the phone with him and gave david a call to find out what were my options. fortunately, the car did have a spare and i decided i'd much rather pay 240 bucks to NRMA which i now consider to be the only friend i have in sydney when it comes to car break downs than to call the bum i call a boyfriend to help me out.

Whilst waiting for by NRMA buddy, who took an hour to come, mart called.

Mart: How's it going?

Me: *in most monotonous voice* fucked up. what do you expect

Mart: what did david say?

me: i found a spare tyre

mart: so what are you doing now?

Me: waiting for the NRMA guy to come

Mart: ok. how much to did you have to pay?

Me: 240 bucks

Mart: wow! didn't know that

I'm thinking: you fucking jerk. piss off

*silence ensues*

Mart: So how long will you have to wait

Me: *still in super sian voice* an hour

mart: oh ok

*silence again*

Mart: is there anything i can do to make you feel better?

Me: *snaps* you could have offered to come down

he comes up with whiny excuses that i've completely shut out

*silence*

if silence could kill, he would have been died many deaths

after prolonged silence and many deaths later, we awkwardly hung up the phone.

i tell myself that episode was an expensive lesson learnt that one should never ever depend on anyone else but i also started to wonder why the fuck was i in a relationship when i couldn't even depend on my boyfriend. I mean here i am, restricting my freedom to see more than one person when i can't even depend on the one person i'm seeing?? as if putting all my eggs in one basket isn't bad enough, i can't even take that basket with me!!!

after the tyre got fixed up, i drove angrily to the hairdresser and had a colour and a trim. after hours of being fussed over, i felt much better and even felt forgiving but the sms i saw on my phone immediately after only served to push my buttons further.

It read: i'm sorry i kinda contributed to your crummy day.

KINDA CONTRIBUTED??!!!!

he's the sole fucking reason.

MEN can be such imbeciles

i seethed and i seethed and i seethed some more

i felt like a boiling cauldron, on the verge of overflowing with rage.

and so i replied him, an hour later, when my anger had lessen and i didn't feel like a raving loony..

and the gist of it was something along the lines of.... in case you didn't realise, YOU're the only reason why i'm having a crummy day. getting a flat tyre is no biggie but you not coming to help me out was a real disappointment etc...

as expected, he called back quickly to apologise but by then it was too late and my anger took over and i couldn't help but rant at him for not being there for me et cetera.

In his defence, he said: i really love you but sometimes i make mistakes too...

and because i'm such a nice softy, i felt bad for making him feel bad and couldn't be angry at him anymore...

LIKE WAT THE FUCK??!!!

he should be skewered on a satay stick and roasted in the deepest regions of hell for making me feel helpless and paying 240 bucks just to get someone to put in a new wheel.

beatrice thinks that aussie men are like that. it's just not in their culture to take care of their girlfriends.

I'm still pissed when i think about it.

Like why the fuck do i have to put things into perspective for these blundering idiots and by blundering idiots i mean MEN

example:
I asked him: so would you help your mom out if she called you about her flat?

Him: no... cos she has an NRMA membership. She woulda called them

Me: *thinking what the fuck!!!* well... *impatience mounting* what if SHE DIDN"T???

Him: *sheepishly* err... i'd go help her out

Me: UH HUH....... *raging*

what is the problem with men. why can't they do the right thing sometimes?

even a week later, i still rage at the thought of this and a whole string of expletives come to mind.

chee byeeeeeeee

Our fortune cookies

Had dinner with Matt the other day. If you're wondering who matt is, he's francis aka frankie's friend from brissy who came down with rod and dan sometime last year. around May i think... and Dan ran down the corridor of their hotel naked... (see archives for entry)...

So anyway, had dinner at this chinese restaurant because dear ol matt loves his chinese food (as well as his chinese girls i found out) and after the dinner, they brought out fortune cookies for us... =) how exciting... after reading zhing's blog a couple of weeks ago where she had a picture of fortune cookies she had in a chinese restaurant, i was under the impression that only in america did you get fortune cookies. But lo and behold, you get them in North Sydeny, Greenwood Seafood Restaurant as well...

According to Mart, if you add the 2 words "in bed" after a fortune cookie fortune, you sometimes get something funky.

So, what did the cookies tell about our fortunes?

Marty's --> You'll always be successful in your business or professional career (""in bed" - haha)

Note the always in his fortune.

Ian's fortune was mostest coolest. His read 'there's a prospect of a thrilling time ahead for you ("in bed" - FUNNY!)" and guess what? Ian's going over to BeiJing on a one week business trip. A white guy in china? a thrilling time seems like an understatement.

Mine i reckon was the most cryptic... it read "think like a person of action, and act like a person of thought"

*scratches head*

so does it mean i should be impulsive but yet think through my actions carefully?

ian reckons i should just sit there and go... "ok i'm gonna do this now! Noooooooooo... wait a minue, what if... NO!! NOW!!! but then........................................"

sounds schizo...

and then even if i did that, it would ultimately mean i'm wishy washy and probably acting more like a person of thought albeit idiotic thoughts than thinking like a person of action.

cheem

It's really funny, when in the ladies, from behind closed cubicle doors, you hear the sound of piss wooshing into the bowl followed by a bubbly fart... and then you wonder who the hell is inside that cubicle, perhaps even lingering (if you don't get too paranoid about the smell) for a little while to see if you can catch sight of said farter.

There's an unwritten rule about pissing and farting in public toilets. But before we digress further, a quick foray into the unwritten rule of pissing and farting in public toilets.

It is widely acknowledged that whilst in use of public toilets where cubicles are created by mere partitions hence allowing for sound to travel easily throughout the entire toilet, one should exercise restraint in letting go of one's stomach gases so as to cause little if not no noise disturbance to the other toilet users. This is to ensure no distress is caused to others and no embarrassment is caused to oneself.

Anyway, not all girls abide by aforementioned rule. As usual, you get the non-conformists. However, there is a difference in the renegades of public piss farting ettiquette and the renegades of generally all other rules in life. The difference being that public piss farting renegades are not of the hip and trendy sort, rather they are usually, old and dowdy... generally uncool and hence the nonchalance. =)

So why the sudden discussion about public piss farting you ask?

*Sheepish*

Whilst taking a piss this morning, i absentmindly let one long happy fart go... happy because it sounded all bubbly *blub blub* so i was like pissing away and my mind was drifting when suddenly the inspiration to fart came about and i started letting one go...

and as the fart continued bubbling out, I soon started wondering if this could go down into the anals of the guiness book of records for longest fart ever (speaking of which i wonder if there is such a record... most probably aye) when i suddenly realised that oopsie... quite inconsiderate of me to consider the feelings of the other toilet users whom i presume at this time were making quick escape plans before the place stank up (i'd like the record to state that there was no stench).

Of course the ones in the cubicles quietly going about their business couldn't make as quick an escape as they hoped...

i was mildly ashamed of myself (if that's even possible) and decided i would stay hidden in the cubicle until everyone left hence avoiding the accusatory stares i might have otherwise been subjected to.

fortunately, after much toilet paper rustling and toilet flushing the toilet was emptied and i slunk out sheepishly (after washing my hands of course)

So... I disobeyed the unwritten public piss farting rule... which would mean that either i'm old and dowdy, i'm getting alzhiemers or BOTH...

In parting, i wonder why we feel obliged to obey the unwritten public piss farting rule. what a pity methinks cos shouldn't the joys of a most satisfying fart, a long bubbly one let off whilst taking a pee be shared?

It was Amanda's bday today. Met up with her and wanted to have dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant along George Street but by the time French lesson ended, the restaurant was closed for the day so we went to good ol superbowl instead.

Don't be fooled by the Ang Mohish name. It's really quite a fantabulous restaurant for cheap hongkong cuisine served up by real hongkongers. you get the greasy chinese restaurant floor, the weak chinese tea in metal pots, the chaos and also the efficient clearing of tables which consists of sloshing gravy into one big plate and staking all other plates up with gravy filled plate at the top most.

Amanda: yao mo ping suey ( do you have iced water)

Waiter: pink suey??? *in a gwei lou accent*

Amanda: iced water

Waiter: orh.... peng suey...

Amanda & me: *laughs* heh heh....

we are hongky wanabes.... and we get a lesson in proper cantonese enunciation.

Dinner was great. Plain white rice with yummy dishes... haven't had that in yonks... i miss home and home cooked food. We had stewed beef brisket and radish, kai lan and oyster sauce, dough sticks, deep fried crispy beef, ba wang chicken and deep fried squid with spicy salt. The best way to feel warm and fuzzy inside is to have hot food down the gullet.... mmm....

Weather in sydney is turing cool. A sign of wintery months ahead. In a blink of an eye, summer is over. Sigh... so much for living it up this summer. It seems i've barely achieved anything. was initially planning to hermitise myself this week to get myself up to speed with the banal necessities of existence like laundry, ironing and the like but then life is to bleeding short to be tied down by unnecessary necessities.

anyway, amidst our little celebration, both of us felt a tinge of melancholia. It was sobering to realise that we're so far away from home. The yummy dinner that reminds me of zhi char at kopitiams, the absence of close friends who care... family...

not that celebrating birthdays was ever that big a deal to me but it's sad when you feel that no one in sydney would really take the effort to. And i feel bad that i didn't make more of an effort for Amanda's bday too... Bah... i'm a bad friend...

Fortunately, the guys were really sweet. Gen drew her a little portrait which i thought was so sweet and they bought her a pudgee toy and gave her flowers and balloons.... awww.... which also kinda reminded me of my bday when eugene, wen cong, hector et al came to my place, bought me a balloon and gave me mr bean's bear... and then the realisation that my friends are all NOT HERE..... waahhhh.............. wahhhhh...... waaahhh........

if only i could transport them here... *sniffles*

went up to Mart's parent's place at sanctuary point over the weekend.

The road trip got off to a rather rocky start due to the St Patrick day's traffic. It seemed as if everyone was hitting the pubs for a green guiness except for the both of us. Traffic into the city was absolutely horrendous and we were starving and getting a little cranky. Not so much at each other but moods were slightly grumpy...

we finally gave up in the city and headed east towards kingsford (chinese populated suburb) in the hopes that the chinese people there were not as keen on celebrating St Pat's as the rest of the sydneysiders...

after filling our tummies at the first empty looking chinese restaurant we found, we both agreed we were in better spirits and gave each other a reassuring hug and officially began our drive down south =)

the drive down was boring really... it was night and there were no street lights along the highway... i can't imagine how mart kept awake but he did and we got there unscathed, plonk our stuff down, had a mini tour of the house and collapsed into bed sound asleep.

most unfortunately, woke up saturday morning to a rather cloudy day but that didn't deter us from making a trip to the beach. oh the beach the beach... it had sand that was so fine it squeaks when you shuffle your feet. i know it sounds hard to believe that sand squeaks but it did... the water was bluish even though the sky was overcast. (did you know that the sea is blue because it reflects the colour of the sky?) It was also unbelievably clean. the only things that were washed up were blue bottles (portugese man of war) and seaweed. No washed up plastic bottles, no plastic bags, cigarette butts nothing...

we took a walk along some rocks which created a mini lagoon where the water was shallow and clear and we could clearly see the sandy bottom...

after our beach stroll, we drove into the little town centre where Mart's mom operated a pharmacy. we bought a pie and a chocolate mud muffin from the bakery next door and they both turned out delicious. the pie had a layer of sweet peas over mince... mm.... and the chocolate mud muffin had a funky layer of chocolate icing. both tasted homemade. i guess you can't go wrong with homemade food. we sat on a wooden log thingy and ate.... enjoying the quiet, the slow pace of life and each other.

everything was unhurried.

by the time we got back home, it was barely 12 noon and we prepared risotto for lunch and then watched "love me if you dare" --> if you haven't watch it you don't know what you're missing. This is like the 2nd time i'm watching this show. Mart knows i really like this movie and bought it was a surprise for me... aww...

after the movie, we walked to the nearby store and bought ice cream and took a walk and kicked a soccer ball in the reserve at the back of his house along St George's basin. we were kinda hoping to spot kangeroos but all we did was spot their shit... darn!! i had to go back in when i realised that the mozzies were feasting on me...

after which we repeated the routine of preparing dinner, watching a dvd and sleep...

sunday morning, woke up, had breckie, played boggle where i lost to mart. i've gotta hand it to him though.. he came up with far more funky words than i did...

we commenced the drive back home at about 11 and stopped at a town, Berry for lunch. Berry is really a cute town. with a motel having a facade entirely covered in car rims, quaint shops selling cute household items, a flea market selling antiques, lots of little cafes and book stores. We had lunch at a cafe with a shady courtyard and before setting off home, we stopped at a trucker stop selling fresh donuts which are fried up only when you order them and dusted with cinnamon and sugar. mmm....

the drive back home from berry was just breath-takingly beautiful with sprawling hills, wineyards, horses and cows languishing in fields, emu farms, more fields, more forests, more hills, winding roads and road trippy music like summer of 69 and travelling at speeds of 110km... i start getting wild ideas in my head of winning millions in the lottery and buying a wineyard or a farm and living out the rest of my life in the country.

now back to city life and reality... bleah

the slob

my boyfriend became officially unemployed last friday in order to fulfill his dream of becoming a useless flea ridden bum that plays world of warcraft all day long. where he intends to get his fleas i have no idea.

Anyway, it's our 2 month aniversary. 15th... i completely forgot *ashamed* but he remembered. So he made the "long and arduous" (HE DROVE AND PARKED IN MY OFFICE) journey of travelling down from Chatswood to the city just to have lunch with Moi........

but horrors of horrors, imagine how aghast i was when the lift doors (at my office lobby might i add) parted to reveal my geek of a boyfriend in what looked like the t-shirt he slept in with creases and all of a suspicious looking shade of grey... and to add to the look, a pair of crumply cargos of a similar greyish hue. Did i mention the t-shirt had a stretched collar as well? was this part of his plan to become a flea ridden dirtbag?

I didn't know if I should laugh or cry...

and mostly, i felt like bouncing off the walls...

i gave him a perfunctory hug and pulled away quite quickly... trying to keep a distance

ok i admit... i was embarrassed...

i crossed my fingers and hoped no one who knew me would see me with this living origami...

Noticing the unusual great show of affection on my part, Marty kinda sussed that i wasn't exactly thrilled about his attire and happily declared "hey... i've got hobo gloves in here... let me just put them on..." (hobo gloves think gloves with the fingers cut off)

and... "there's a hole in the underarm of my t-shirt"

*big grin on his face*

Nooooooo i screamed silently... as i gaped at him in disbelief... what was wrong with him or was it me?? (begs the age old question of who is the bigger the loser. The loser himself? or the one that actually likes the loser?)

i swear he probably does this just to get some reaction from me...

woe be to me...

i refuse to look at his armpits and start chanting a little mantra in my head...

"out of sight, out of mind. out of sight, out of mind"

Me: you look like you're wearing the clothes you slept in.

Mart (proudly): I am wearing the clothes i sleep in

Me: No... you slept naked last night

Mart: yeah i usually wear this t-shirt to bed.

Me: How could you wear this out. you're unbelievable

Mart: I was wearing this at home and i was rushing out to meet you so i forgot

Me: Forgot? How could you? Would you rush out in your boxers?

Mart: No... cos i wouldn't be wearing my boxes and walking around at home

Me: and so you would wear cargos and a t-shirt at home but not dress up better to go out.

Mart: Yeah of course. What if a burglar comes? I wouldn't want to be seen in boxers.

Me: Right of course!! (i see the light now... my boyfriend is retarded)

I sighed inwardly and reminded myself of the reasons why i like him... cos he's sweet, cute, tall, smart, funny and he loves me to bits.... but is it enough for me to justify dating a daggy dresser???

so throughout lunch, i refuse to look below his neck. which is really hard when you're dating someone tall... so how do you manage? you stand side by side at traffice lights, keep your eyes focused ahead and think happy thoughts. of course, once seated at lunch, things get a whole lot easier...



a little while later

After i got off work, Mart came by to the city to pick me up again... in the same ghetto get up... and this time...

"i just bladed from Chatswood to Artamon"

Great... now he's sweaty and maybe even stinky to boot...

i narrow my eyes at him, shake my head and stare at the road straight ahead...

after dinner, i try to make him see my point of view...

Me: Ok... imagine if you were working in the city right? and i came in to meet you for lunch dressed in my PJs.... How would you feel?

Mart: that'd be cool

Me: What would your colleagues think?

Mart: See, in IT it's different

In my head i silently curse the IT profession and their unwritten rule about wearing crappy clothes to work

Me: What if you had to wear shirts and pants to work? and i turned up in PJs

Mart: They'd go "COOL!! you have a girlfriend!! we just play computer games"

I couldn't help but laugh although images of him bending over so i could kick his arse popped in my head.

But just when i thought he couldn't get any worse, he out does himself my showing me the tear in his t-shirt...

Might i add, he did so with pride...

it's so big you could fit a fist in... yet he doesn't see what's wrong

yeeeeeeeeaaaaggghhhhhhhhh.................

Someone kill me puh... leaseeeeeeee.........

The "Z" monster

i got woken up in the middle of the night to a weird wooshy noise... it sounded not too different from a whale's blowhole. Or the sound of air being expelled from pursed lips.

*ppppffffffff*

I tried to ignore the disturbance but i could feel myself slowly rising from my slumber...

*uurrgghhh..........*

i grunted irritably at the oaf next to me...

the only response i got, more blowing.....

i slapped my hand feebly at the beached whale....

the blowing stopped.....

I felt relief....

ahh..... back to slumberland....

dozing..... dozing.....

*pppppfffff*

Damn!!!

try ignoring.....

"sleep.. sleep..." i tell myself

as if in defiance, a couple of superbly loud blows......

*PPPPPFFFFFF*

*PPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFF*

arghh.............

i resort to violence of the prodding, shoving and toe jamming nature but the beast could not be aroused.

finally....

i implored, "babeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.... i can't sleeep!!!"

and it goes, "I can't help it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" (and he denied any recollection of this the next day)

from a tip i got off a website on how to date geeks, it mentioned the best way to communicate with a geek is via emails... so the next morning, i send him this...


On 15/03/06, Mindy Chia wrote:

To whom it may concern,

I'm writing in to complain about noise disturbance that I experienced whilst in the midst of my slumber last night.

I was rudely awoken by strange whooshing noises that were reptitive and quite loud. They seem to have come from this huge and cumberous form lying next to me. Any form of prodding, shoving and toe jamming of the source failed to stop said noise pollution and it was hard for me to fall back to sleep.

Can you kindly see what can be done about this.

Much appreciated

and his reply?

From :
Martin Butler
Sent :
Tuesday, March 14, 2006 11:12 PM
To :
"Mindy Chia"

Subject : Re: noise disturbance



Dear Mademoiselle,

I understand your concerns and will take steps to see that the culprits are suitably punished. I am as surprised as you are that toe jamming of the source failed to solve the problem, as this works in 99% of the world's problems (our push to cure world hunger through toe jamming is progressing apace of projections). What time were you rudely awoken by this cur? We will endeavour to keep you up to date on actions taken in this matter.

Yours with concern,

Hon. Martin Butler MP

Finally decided to switch to blogspot instead after being thwarted from blogging a couple of times by friendster.
IT support from friendster is zilch if you're not a paying member.
An email i sent to the support staff asking for assistance was "politely" rejected,
saying no form of IT support would be given unless i could "show them the money"
Bleah....
So anyho, here i am... with my new site up and running... Now to get over my writer's block...


I managed to chalk up 120km over this weekend travelling around sydney.
On saturday night, i baked a loaf of banana bread and headed of to Mart's place to surprise him. He was hard at work on some website he's been contracted to do so I thought i'd do something nice for him.
So immediately after i took the bread out of the oven, i drove to his place (11km thereabouts). The banana bread was still warm when i got there.
Unfortunately, he was not surprised to see me. I attribute this to a couple of reasons. I'm always full of surprises such that i'm no longer surprising. He always has "surprise" visits from his friends.
Anyway... so the next morning, woke up and hauled ass to Thelma and Louise which is this cafe by the water at Neutral Bay. Suli introduced this cafe to me when Victor and Violet were in town for a holiday.
Neutral Bay is a rather quiet suburb, rather classy... should be expensive to buy property there. So on a Sunday morning, all the upper-class preppy north shore folks dressed in their sunday best come to this cafe to have their breckies.
Darn we should have taken pics but unfortunately we didn't have our cameras with us. Bookings must be made in advance and service is mediocre simply because there's too much for the few waiters to contend with. Not that the cafe is choked with people. Au contraire, the tables are all nicely filled and waiting people are politely invited to wait at the picnic tables located outside the cafe facing the water.
They serve coffees in bowls here and the menu has your standard big breakfasts with eggs, bacon, sausages, tomatoes, mushies and bread, the eggs benedict with ham/salmon, or eggs with toast, yogurt and muesli etc...
Coffee and food was pas mal (not bad - french), the whole thing was more for the ambience i suppose.

So anyway, after breckie, we headed out to this park at mosman that was at the water's edge too. That's the thing about sydney. weekend outdoorsy activities always revolve around water water water. There we lay in the grass and vegged out for a bit.

It was then that the idea of driving up to Akuna bay struck me. On such a beautiful day as this, nothing better than enjoying a nice drive through to Akuna bay i reckon. So we drove all the way up from Chatswood (his place), to Dee Why (beach), to church point, into Kuringai Chase National Park and into Akuna bay where we had ice coffee and vegged out somemore. See pics above for drive up....

After Akuna Bay, dropped mart off home and headed out shortly to have dinner with Amanda at Homebush and then headed home.

--> total distance travelled? 120km